> > In case you needed further proof that the human race is
doomed through
> > stupidity, here are some actual label instructions
on consumer goods.
> >
> > On a Sear's hairdryer:
> >
"Do not use while sleeping."
> > (Gee that's the only time I have to
work on my hair.)
> >
> > On a bag of Fritos:
> >
"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
> >
inside."
> > (The shoplifter special)
> >
> > On a
bar of Dial soap:
> > "Directions: Use like regular soap."
> >
(And that would be how ...?)
> >
> > On some Swanson frozen
dinners:
> > "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
> > (But it's
"just" a suggestion)
> >
> > On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom):
> > "Do not turn upside down."
> > (Too
late!)
> >
> > On Marks & Amp; Spencer Bread
Pudding:
> > "Product will be hot after heating."
> > (As
night follows day . . .)
> >
> > On packaging for a Rowenta
iron:
> > "Do not iron clothes on body."
> > (But wouldn't
this save me more time?)
> >
> > On Boot's Children Cough
Medicine:
> > "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after
taking
> > this medication."
> > (We could do a lot to reduce
the rate of construction
> > accidents if we could just get those
5-year-olds with
> > head-colds off those forklifts.)
>
>
> > On Nytol Sleep Aid:
> > "Warning: May cause
drowsiness."
> > (One would hope.)
> >
> > On most
brands of Christmas lights:
> > "For indoor or outdoor use
only."
> > (As opposed to what?)
> >
> > On a
Japanese food processor:
> > "Not to be used for the other
use."
> > (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)
> >
> > On
Sainsbury's peanuts:
> > "Warning: contains nuts."
> > (Talk
about a news flash.)
> >
> > On an American Airlines packet of
nuts:
> > "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
> > ( Step 3:
Fly Delta.)
> >
> > On a child's superman costume:
>
> "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
> > (I don't
blame the company. I blame parents for this
> > one.)
>
>
> > On a Swedish chainsaw:
> > "Do not attempt to stop
chain with your hands or
> > genitals."
> > (Was there a lot
of this happening somewhere? My God!)
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