Then Jesus said to them, "But now whoever has a wallet must
take it along, and his traveling bag, too. And the one who has no sword must
sell his coat and buy one."
in other words....Buy a Gun
"We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office."
"Of all the
contrivances for cheating the laboring classes of mankind, none has been more
effective than that which deludes them with paper money."
- Daniel Webster
you cant make this crap up...
Walter Williams on target again
Ed and Dorothy met while on vacation and Ed fell head over heels 'in love'
with her. But after a couple of weeks in which Ed took Dorothy out to various
dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, etc., he was convinced that it was true
love. And so, on the last night of his vacation, the two of them went to dinner
and had a serious talk about how the relationship would continue.
'It's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut,' said Ed to his
newfound lady friend. 'I eat, sleep and breathe golf, so if that's going to be a
problem, you'd better say so now!'
Dorothy took a deep breath and responded, 'Since we're being so
honest with each other, here goes...you need to know that I'm a hooker.'
'I see,' Ed replied. 'That's a problem, for sure.' He spent some
time looking down at the table, deep in thought.
Then he added, 'You know, it's probably because you're not keeping
your wrists straight when you tee off.'
middle aged married couple on vacation in Jamaica walked into
A sandal shop.
While in the shop the Jamaican said to them,
'I have some special sandals I
think you would be interested in.
Dey make you wild at sex.'
wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what
The man claimed,
but her husband felt he really didn't need them,
Being the sex god he
The husband asked the man, 'How could sandals make you into a sex
The Jamaican replied, 'Just try dem on, Mon.'
So, the husband,
after some badgering from his wife, finally gave in,
And tried them on.
soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his
Something his wife hadn't seen in many years!
In the blink of an
eye, the husband grabbed the Jamaican, bent him
Violently over a table,
yanked down his pants, ripped down his own pants,
And grabbed a firm hold of
the Jamaican's hips.
The Jamaican then began screaming, 'You got dem on the
Having already downed a few power drinks, she turned around,
looked him straight in the eye and said:
"Listen up, Buddy.
anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, in the car,
back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down,
naked or with clothes
on, dirty, clean ... it doesn't matter to me!
I've been doing it ever since I
got out of college and I just love it."
Eyes now wide with interest, he
"No kidding. I'm a lawyer, too! What firm are you